Inside Out: June 2022

Friday, June 17th and Saturday June 18th at 7:00 PM

An exploration of the complex emotions of modern life with a circus twist.

The show was a great success! Thank you to the performers and the great sold out audiences on both nights.

Act 1: Aerial Hoop

Performance, Choreography and Costume by Chesney Austin
Music: Arwen’s Vigil by The Piano Guys

Have you ever felt like you want there to be change in your life? To not be afraid to step out and meet new people? Have you ever been unsure of yourself, and felt like you don’t know how to start? So you are just left waiting listlessly, going through life. Feeling like you are on the outside looking in. Do you see friends getting married and starting their own families? It seems like they have a perfect life. At times it can be so frustrating. You’re longing for things that aren’t yours and seem out of reach. You’re waiting and hoping your time will come.

Our next performer has been through this and more, and she’s come to discover that being ok with who you are and where you are in life is important. And it’s ok to just be ok.

Act 2: Aerial Silks

Performance, Choreography and Costume by Tina Ellis
Music: Breathe Me by Sia

They say you never really “get over” losing a loved one. Grief is an inevitable emotion all humans will encounter throughout their lifetime, probably multiple times. The process of grief is fluid, comes in waves, and never quite resolves. Grief is thought to have 5-7 stages: Shock, Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Testing and Processing, and Acceptance and Hope.

Our next performer was faced with the most difficult period of grief and loss of her life in October 2019, when her father passed away suddenly. There was no chance for exchanging I love you’s or to say thank you. No goodbye.

Then one week later, she discovered she was unexpectedly pregnant. In the haze of grief from losing her father, she felt hope of new life. She had always dreamed of being a mother and having a family. She was scared, but this new life growing inside her was magical and felt like a gift from her father. She bought a house and started to prepare for this next wonderful stage of her life. But, unfortunately just 5 weeks later, came a second loss, a second wave of grief crashing down. She had a miscarriage at 11 weeks. It was devastating.

In the following years, she experienced all the stages of grief, sometimes simultaneously, sometimes independently. Each new stage lasted weeks, sometimes months. After two years and a lot of work, she still experiences moments of sadness, but at this point, she has mostly settled into the last stage of grief: acceptance and hope. Acceptance of the new reality so unwillingly forced upon her, and hope in beautiful memories of the loved ones lost, and for the promise of new beginnings.

Act 3: Aerial Hoop

Performance, Choreography and Costume by Katie Sophia
Music: 9 to 5 by Dolly Parton

Our next performer has been overworked and overwhelmed striving for perfection. Wake up, eat a balanced breakfast, do Jane Fonda’s lean routine workout, get dressed, then off to work. Constant stress but trying to stay calm through the state of panic going on in her mind. She is strong, resilient, and still gets things done but damn she’s had to work hard just to get by.

ADHD running her brain making it go in a million different places all at one time. Open the dryer and before you know it you are watering the plants in another room. She’s dealing with anxiety and depression in a complicated world, could you relate?

Working towards the ultimate perfect working woman balance of a happy life. Some days are easier, sometimes one would even say fabulous.

Through help from loved ones, her idols like the women in 9 to 5, performing aerial and some medication, she continues to work on herself everyday. She hopes to take the stigma away from being open about getting help because if your brain doesn’t produce enough serotonin sometimes store bought is fine.

Remember every day is a new day to stumble out of bed, pour yourself a cup of ambition and try to come to life no matter what it has in store. Shake up expectations of you, challenge the norm and remember you are fabulous. When times are tough just remember the tide will change and it’s all going to roll your way.

Act 4: Aerial Silks

Performance, Choreography and Costume by Kari Kistler
Music: Like a Prayer by Imany

Our next performer​​ has always been so *sure* of her life’s path, her calling. She’s been devoted to the ARTS since the age of 16! But what happens when that certainty drains away, little by little, year by year? When you’re staring down the tunnel of another 25 years of doing the same thing, and you’re not sure you love it the same way you did when you were younger? There’s confusion, doubt, longing, sometimes hope and excitement for a possible “new” path, but then fear, and again, that doubt.

What should the path forward be? Where is that certainty that her younger self felt? She knew if she just worked hard enough, practiced more, went to the best schools and studied with the best teachers then she would Make It! And technically she has- her teacher always tells her there are 30 people who would trade their lives to have what she has- to make a living as an artist. But it just doesn’t feel right! ….And there’s that doubt again!

It’s terrifying to make a decision to change your life, to give up everything you’ve devoted your life to for the last 20+ years. Is that really the right choice? Finding the right path forward can truly be a mystery.

Act 5: Aerial Hoop

Performance, Choreography and Costume by Lauren Hernandez-Rubio
Music: I AM WOMAN by Emmy Meli

Confidence comes from within. Assurance in who you are, what you desire, and what you are capable of. Erasing self doubt. An infectious energy. However empowering this feeling is, the wrong relationships can snuff it out. Our next performer had surrounded herself with controlling people. They were restricting her self expression and discouraging her light. Questioning her decisions on her career, her friends, what she wore. Her confidence wavered. Each time she tried to shake off the negativity they would push her back down. Ultimately when she needed a support system the most, they pulled the rug out from under her feet. But she did not fall. She found her footing and realized she was finally free.

She is woman, fearless, creative. Reclaiming her confidence and breaking free from insignificant restraints. Overcoming odds to achieve her goals. Surrounding herself with people who want to see her succeed. Owning her femininity, her talent, and her strength. Empowered.

Act 6: Aerial Silks

Performance, Choreography and Costume by Lindsey Morgan
Music: Surface Pressure by Jessica Darrow

Burnout is real. Technically, it is defined as chronic stress that has not been successfully managed, leading to feelings of depletion, exhaustion, and cynicism. Our next performer She seemed to have a pathological inability to say NO to anything that was asked of her. Constantly overwhelmed, she recognized that she was doing it to herself, and yet, she couldn’t break the cycle. Always an overachiever, she had been a straight A student from grade school through graduate school. At the same time, she was juggling several other activities including competitive gymnastics and dance teams, as well as participation in clubs and honor societies.

By the time she began her professional career, filling every hour of the day was the norm. She had an intense case of fear of missing out, combined with an equally strong fear of disappointing anyone. She prided herself on following the Golden Rule and believed anything worth doing was worth doing well which often meant doing it herself, rather than letting others help.

The trouble is, the more people recognize you as a reliable, hard worker, the more they tend to ask of you. As her responsibilities grew, she often found herself agreeing to take on tasks she really didn’t have time to do, either because she was worried the opportunity wouldn’t come again, or simply because she didn’t want to let anyone down. She was constantly re-working her schedule to fit it all in, but it was clear she was overextended and exhausted. Something had to give…

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